I'm not gonna lie, being wanted feels pretty good. We all enjoy the immediate sense of gratification when someone tells us how much they missed or needed us while we were away. However I recently came to the realization that being missed is not always what we should aim for. It doesn't do you or the other party any good.
During
my travels back to the states I was contacted a few times by some of the people I work with and that really bothered me. It bothered me that they needed me to explain certain procedures that I do on a weekly basis - they were tasks that I could explain in no time at all if I did it properly.
But that's just the thing, I didn't.
In all the time before I left I never really took the time out to show others what I knew. I never set aside a moment to share the skills someone else had taught me. I guess I was so distracted by an ego that secretly fed on the "well done"s and "good job"s to stop and think that someone else could benefit from me passing on my experience to them.
The more I thought about what I could have done better the more I realized that this happens far too often and not just with me either. In a society where it's do or die, fall or fly I think we've forgotten that we can also strive to be the best without (unknowingly or intentionally) tripping up those around us. It should never be about building our own self up to the point that if we were to ever move that our community would fall. Am I saying you shouldn't improve or grow yourself? No. But should you selfishly take everything for yourself so you can look better than everyone else? Think again.
It is possible for co-workers, teammates, siblings, parents, and all other types of people who work together to better themselves without diminishing or undermining the other(s). Here's how:
1. What does each person like doing and what is each person good at? They might turn out to have the same answers or they might be different but it's still important that you make it. This way everyone starts off on the same foot and clear guidelines are made.
2. From those lists, you can now decide who does what. It doesn't have to be permanent or signed in blood because things can change. Maybe one person can do one task for a certain time period or 2+ people can work together just until the task is done.
3. After everyone has spent some time in their own respective areas take a moment to ask everyone what they liked, didn't like, and maybe what they would like to learn from/teach to others (We all know you're pretty rad in HTML coding but hey, maybe someone else would like to learn it too. And to the person who's been answering phones at the front desk for the last however long, don't be afraid to ask your higher-up if they could show you how to put together a killer business presentation). Not only does talking it out build a stronger sense of community but it eases the work load when you know that that guy Steve in accounting wouldn't mind helping you out with your next project because he likes working with Adobe Suite too.
4. Stop looking at it like a ladder but rather an elevator.
Ladders make no room for multiple people to share in the success because there's only room for one. Not to mention, the only way you can see the other people while you're on the ladder is if you're looking down at them. Elevators on the other hand are big enough to make room for more people at once. So while you are all on your way up you can actually talk and seeing each other face to face.
5. Trust your talent. You are good, like really good - you wouldn't be where you are if you weren't. Your talent has gotten you this far and given more time and polishing your future has endless possibilities for growth.
6. If someone else comes along with the same strengths as you...
a. Don't think any less of yourself. Like I said, you are good.
b. Never try to put them down in attempts to raise yourself up. Doing that only wastes the time you could have used to be productive. Not to mention it makes you look bad to everyone else.
c. Steal their stuff. Okay, not really but still. They might have a similar position but maybe the way they do it is different so this is a good chance for you to learn a new technique (Only don't just copy it action for action, make it your own).
7. Remember why you got into this. Chances are, it wasn't the money or publicity but interest, passion, and drive. Your reason for doing all this will keep you humble and happy when it everything gets a bit hectic.
