patience

Life is crazy. Learn to deal.

With November now officially in full swing I now can look back at the quick blur that was October. It brings to mind all of  the things that happened that month. Although no event in particular was anything for the history books even so, it was a “busy” month. Longs weeks filled with packing our house into boxes, preparing for finals, birthdays, working on projects, catching up with friends, organizing events for church - a basic jambalaya of sorts.

Although, it wasn’t all bad though, in the cray of it all I learned this: 

Life is crazy. It always has been and it always will be. Learn to deal. 

It took me quite a bit of time to realize there is no reason to miss the days when Saturday morning cartoons and nap time were our way of life when we can have that today. Well, not necessarily but at least we can have something similar. 

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Whether you are 5, 10, 24, or 59+ all that is needed is a bit of grace and patience. Grace in the sense that we must know it is possible to do anything with God - small or grand. 

And patience to deal with the changes that come your way. In order to have a different life away from stress and fuss you’re gonna have to do things differently - a godly type of different.  Some days you’re going to think that your way is best and want to continue on that path but don’t. Stop and let God direct your steps no matter how crazy they seem. 

Which, if you ask me is the greatest news I’ve heard in a while. We don’t have to think for ourselves, that burden is now up to Him. 

So, while October flew in with a bevy of overwhelming plans, God reminded me that the same peace He gave me as a child is the same peace I can have now if I only believe in Him. Just because my circumstances and settings have now changed does not mean God has done the same.  

Think of it this way, the “little” amount of faith it takes you to trust in God to deliver the sun the next day is the same amount of faith it should take to trust in Him for deliverance of your student loans, the baby your hoping for, the job position you’ve been eying for the last few months. 

So stop stressing.  Stop making plans to do this on your own. Stop thinking that because you didn’t get what you want you never will. Stop fussing over the things God has already covered. Just stop. 

Life is crazy. It always had been and it always will be. The only way we can deal is to let God.

Here Is To...

Many of my girlfriends have recently become engaged and/or gotten married. While I am happy for them it makes me all the more excited for myself. It’s a bit crazy to think that whoever and wherever he is God created him just for me. I’m excited for the adventures, the laughs, the joy, and growth. Similarly I’m also expectant of the disagreements and opposing opinions but I’m willing to take them in stride if it means I get to spend the rest of my life with a great guy.

Inspired by my friends who have recently changed their last names, reading through a number of mommy-blogs, and a few talks with God I made a list of a few things I’m looking forward to sharing with Mr. Future when the time comes (Might just have to print them and place them in large format frames to hang on the walls later).

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So whether you are single, dating, engaged, or married, what are some of the things you guys are looking forward to in the future or have enjoyed so far?

Leave your replies here! (bottom of the post) I’d love to hear your stories.

You live that life

"I wanna live until I die. Don’t let the devil bury me alive." - Ben Rector.
I have come to realize that there is more to life and living than just being awake. There is much more than just hoping to have a great story to tell at the end. There is work to be done and it never stops. However daunting that last sentence may sound, it is nothing to be discouraged by. The work planned for our futures can be good and prosperous if we allow it to be. I should know, the last six months have been a process of learning just that.

I started the beginning of my year at the end of  chapter in which I needed to so desperately to close: acceptance for the normal. Looking retrospectively I wouldn’t call it acceptance for the norm but more like a fear for the possible. Although I claimed to be a hard worker and convinced those around me that I was, I never fully tried my hand at anything. Fear had me believing that failure was always eminent so I just thought what was the point in trying? 

I’ve said it in previous posts before, fear will have you feeling all these emotions God never intended for you to have. 

These last few months, God has been breaking down my former ways to build up something of value and substance. He has been creating a new thing in me and to speak frankly, it is one of the most confusingly difficult, heart-wrenching, mind-draining, and strangest journeys I have ever embarked on. When He wants something done, there is no going back and forth or no such thing as test-driving (James 1: 2-8) - it’s all in or all out. In everything I involved myself with, I found Him speaking to me and pushing me to do more than I expected of myself. There were -and still are- days where it became such a hassle to 2nd-guess all of my actions. Things like: Is this the best way to use your time? ; Are you sure that there is no better way to complete this task?; Why don’t you do this later so you can put something else first?; Why are you going that route instead of this one?; Have you tried asking for help? At times it feels like God had cast such a large burden on my shoulders that I began making excuses to stop all the lessons He had been trying to instill in me. But then He found ways to show me through life encounters and experiences that He was doing those things out of love for me.

To best try and explain, I guess I would have to say it’s the “little” things. A few weeks ago I was in class waiting to talk to my Studio Lighting teacher about one of the bulbs not working. I later found her talking to another student. Their conversation did take quite a while but instead of reverting to my old ways by giving up and attempting to figure out the problem myself, I waited. Maybe many of you don’t know the feeling but if you tend to be an impatient person, 5-10 minutes can feel like a full-on hour. Fortunately, by sticking around the teacher noticed me and also included me in the last bit of the conversation she was having. If it had not been for  God laying  it upon my heart to wait I never would have learned the tips I did that got me higher marks on my next assessment.

So you see, it is not as though this whole process has been forced upon me, it’s more like He’s showing me that there is nothing to be anxious for and through that I have gained enough courage to do more.(Micah 6:8). Then, after that more is done, move onto the next and make it a habit of constantly improving your life. Yes, you too will probably also feel like staying at your current comfortable level, (why fix something if it’s not broken?) but that’s not the point of life. We must make the most out of it and continually do the things He asks of us. They are not to tire you out or annoy you but to improve you and give you a life full of actual… well, life.

I have a few friends but don't feel bad for me.

It’s a process. My last two months in this semi-new place have been a process. During my time here I have been asked quite a number of times in many different ways, “How is Australia treating you?” Well, to put it simply, it’s a process. I remember on the plane ride over here I had so many thoughts, expectations, and plans for my “new” life that I forgot to leave room for reality. So 60 some-odd days later I am now being hit with the stark realization that I don’t have as many  friends as I thought I would; I’m not living in the city nor do I even have a place of my own; my photography business is not thriving the way it was before; and school is a bit much to handle even along side my part-time job. As cool as it would be to say that I moved back to Sydney and landed a nice job that allows me to live a rich life in the city, I cannot. However,  I don’t want anyone to feel bad for me. There is nothing to feel bad for. Yes, I don’t have many friends but the few that I do are worth more than their weight in gold . My photography business is not doing so well but maybe this is the time God set aside for me to focus less on money and more on morals. School and work may be overwhelming but when is ever not? I need to suck it up and remember that this is what I wanted. This is what I prayed countless days for. You see, to anyone - myself included - who tries to rush a process you will find yourself nowhere but at the end of your line with nothing to show for it. You will have sped so far ahead that you forgot to pick up the precious gems along the way. Things take time.